DeViations - Gamer Humor - You asked for it!

by Fugli

Characters should perform inane and inappropriate actions in hopes of getting a skill check. ("I'll try real hard to catch what that kid's listening to on his earphones. Is that worth a Listen check?")
Constantly overeating on the grounds that an increased SIZE means more hitpoints and a better damage bonus.
Fail that research roll? Use interrogating skill on the librarian instead.
Argue that hard liquor should act like a healing potion for Sanity points.
Frustrated with the poor selection of guns at the local sporting goods store? Try invoking the famous last words "Where's the nearest Army base?".
"Just look at that damage! Hmm... how far can you chuck a Claymore? I mean, it's just like a big frisbee."
"20 HP worth of armor?!? Man, I'll strap a sandbag to my chest too!"
GM: "So you RAM the creature with your Suburban, do you? Um... who was riding shotgun?"
Player 1: "Uh, not me." "I'm not." "I'm pretty sure all four of us were in the back seat."
Player 2: "Man, why'd I take Drive Auto..?"
Trying to fire a gun with your eyes closed. "Hey, that thing has to fail its Luck roll eventually, and I'm not looking at the damn thing."
Monster damage: "I don't have that many d6's!"
Logically, the best way to take out a Great Old One is by calling up an even GREATER Old One (the "summon 'em all and let the Gods sort it out" approach.)
And finally, have the entire adventure hinge on the most useless skill known to man: Accounting.